Sally Gerard

Another Christmas has come and gone. I was blessed to get to spend time with my family, especially my children and their partners. I’ve always prayed that they would both find that special someone to spend their life with, that would challenge them to reach further than ever they thought they could to reach their dreams and goals and to become all that they were meant to be, and, to do that for their partner as well. I think they are both on that road.

We shed tears together as we sat in the dark theatre watching Mary Poppins Returns, and I was especially touched at the poignant song where the little boy assures his father that their mother who died is always with them inside. I miss my children, sometimes so much that it hurts, and that song reminded me that they are never far away, not really.

As I move through my day, writing, teaching, caring for our critters and creatures, and walking the plains, they are with me just as all of those I love. And as we move toward the beginning of new year, I am reminded of all that I want to be and am meant to be and I take those tiny baby steps in that direction and hope you do as well.

Today, one of my big sisters turns 60 (Happy Birthday, Julie), and the rest of us are not far behind. Some of us are ahead. We manage to bicker about some things, celebrate some things, enjoy some of the same things, and we always cherish any amount of time we get to have together.

We’ve had to say goodbye to our littlest sister in one of the worst ways imaginable. In fact, none of us would have imagined it. Gathering in the woods, in the Colorado mountains that she loved, we said our final goodbye and let her go this weekend.

We circled up and when we do that together, we are a force of love to be reckoned with. Because in the end, we do love each other with all our hearts no matter what.

Goodbye Cathy, you were well-loved and will always be missed.

Busy. How is it that we all get so busy this time of year? We’re supposed to be preparing, anticipating, and readying ourselves for the most amazing love born in the humblest of beginnings, just like most of us.

But, there are things to do, people to see, boats to throw around (okay, that is definitely an inside joke). That one black heifer won’t leave the hose alone, can’t be trusted by the stock tank without supervision when it is filling. I watch her, but at the same time, I’m sitting with my computer by the round bales (I know, they’ve been outlawed so cattle can get a square meal) grading or writing. When I’m writing, well, my focus turns inward. Same thing when I’m grading. I have to make myself look up, and yep, here comes that long black tongue stealing under the hose and trying to wrap around it. Is it stupid cattle tricks for the late night heifer show? I don’t know.

Things to do: appreciate the blessing right in front of my face, after all, these heifers could be distant relatives of that long-ago manger, couldn’t they?

Pixabay.com

Waking up in the middle of the night, I heard the yip and bark of a coyote outside our bedroom window. Looking out, I couldn’t see him, but I know he was close. There are so many times when I feel that deep connection to the land and the natural world, and this was one of those times. He didn’t yip for long and then was off to wherever his night was going to bring him. There is joy in small things, and I’ve heard it described as “time stamps” of joy that mark us if we let them.

Christmas lights are one of the constant “time stamps” of joy in my life. I can hardly wait to put them up and I totally drag my feet taking them down. I love the sparkle and different colors and the way they remind me of who I should be, as light in this world. I love the way the tinsel shimmers in their glow on the tree and the reflection in the shiny round balls hanging on the branches.

The funny little notes I get from my students when they submit work and they aren’t sure it’s correct, or they just want me to know how hard they worked on it. Snap Chats from old students of their fuzzy little band new pups all cuddled up together for a nap. A Text message from a best friend about “The Perfect Colorado Ice Cream Road Trip.” And family gathering in all different places and configurations over the Christmas season in love and with good tidings.

Inspired by some recent professional development on engaging students who school online, I’ve been thinking a lot about engagement. It is a buzz word that has stayed buzzing for a few years now in education. “How are you engaging your students?” “How are you personalizing each student’s learning?” And my favorite, “How are you fostering a Growth Mindset?”

I’m not a fan of buzz words and latest trends. I am a fan of figuring out what will get a student excited. What can I do to help them find their passion and use it in their learning? What am I doing to encourage, to excite a love of learning and discovery? Do I recognize when I am discouraging them and reach out to fix it? What am I doing that is showing my students how to take care of themselves in this world, while at the same time holding the bar high so they bring out their best game?

I’ve tried a lot of different crazy things and I don’t get a lot of feedback, but when I do, I listen. One family says they wait for my weekly email and sit around the computer to share the dumb joke I always open with. Another student said that her younger siblings love my “videos from the farm,” and: “Especially the cows, Mrs. G!” Another student designed his travel brochure assignment using my mini-hiking vacation and capturing some of the images in the video I sent after I got back.

Does it bring them all in? No, not by a long shot. But it brings some and one-at-a-time, that has to count.

Thanksgiving Day is tomorrow and that means most of my students have been missing in class this week, which is too bad as it was a good opportunity to catch up because there was no new work assigned. The good part was that I had an opportunity to really connect through video, my live office, and the phone with those who were working.

During one of those phone calls with a single dad and his daughter, I was surrounded, even on the phone, by the sheer joy in their relationship. They took turns talking to me, but I could hear the other in the background laughing or offering some tidbit to share with me. I must have smiled for an hour after that call; it was such a blessing.

We talked about life in a rural area and providing our Thanksgiving meal from the land around us. We share pear trees in common and so I told them about the pear pie I was making for our meal from the harvest of our trees and I heard, in turn, about their pecan harvest…pecan pie anyone?

It reminded me that reaching out to my students in a more personal way always engages them in the class content more. I don’t know how many subjects outside the “assignment parameters” I’ve approved this week, but the results have been some really creative work showcasing the exact same skills they needed to learn, but with their culture and their choices reflected. I am thankful for my students, plagiarists and all.

The warm sun put us both to sleep, my head tucked in against Felago’s front leg. He had this way of shielding me from the nightmares that often came with sleep. I never rested as easy when I was not near him. Stretching, I knew we had to get back. The sun was so low to the horizon that we’d barley beat the dusk.

I imagined our shadow against the last rays of the sun would have brought some eyes skyward, but our lake location was safe enough. There was no possible way to tell exactly where we’d come from or, so I thought. It’d been almost six months since that first ride. It wasn’t something I’d planned, but Bob and Marcia, my neighbors, had seen me walking and offered Felago to take me to the town about twenty miles from where we lived. They knew I went every week and that I always walked to the transport station six miles down the road.

I was nervous but agreed to try it. Bob showed me how to get on and that I only needed to tell the dragon where I wanted to go and he’d to the rest. There were a million questions in my mind. How would he know where to land? Would he wait for me? What would he do while I took care of my business? What if I fell off?

And then I heard that low hum and the rumble of his voice in my mind. Startled, I jumped. “Hey, don’t be so nervous,” Bob said, “You’ll be just fine.”

I stared at him. Hadn’t he heard that? Shaking my head, I smiled and let him help me up. “Um, thanks Bob. I’ll bring him back, and not late.” That sounded lame. That low rumble in my head sounded like a laugh.

“Felago will take good care of you,” Marcia said, “and we’ll see you tonight.”

With that Felago took off and a little screech came out of my throat as I grabbed for the strap around the dragon’s neck.